'The Celebrity Apprentice' recap: I Wanna Be Your Dog

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Mechanical dog. Mechanical dog. Mechanical dog. Mechanical dog. Mechanical dog. Mechanical dog. Mechanical dog. Mechanical dog. Mechanical dog. Mechanical dog. Mechanical dog. Mechanical dog. Mechanical dog. Mechanical dog. Mechanical dog. Mechanical dog. There. That may seem excessive, but it is still approximately 13,872 less mentions of the words “mechanical dog” than uttered during last night’s episode of All-Star .

Mechanical dog here. Mechanical dog there. Mechanical everywhere! There were so many damn mentions of mechanical dogs I was concerned we were about to be attacked by some sort of robot canine army. I would say that “mechanical dog” was uttered every single sentence, but that would be grossly inaccurate. Because judging by this quote by one , it was actually uttered twice every sentence: “The mechanical dog was my responsibility, but I didn’t have any support from my teammates on the mechanical dog.”

Someone needs to go right now and do a supercut of every mention of the phrase “mechanical dog” from the episode. It may be as long as the episode itself. In case you missed it — and really, what good excuse do you have for missing an episode of All-Star — and are confused as to why this was all happening, here’s a brief recap. Once the teams were tasked with creating a video promoting LG electronic devices, Plan B Project Manager decided to have his video be him acting like a mechanical dog — whatever the hell that is — which was to include him barking as well as getting down on all fours and humping the coffee table. I want to be absolutely clear that I am not making up some funny joke here. I am

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